What If....

Long before pencils and paper were invented on planet Earth, a notebook and a chewed on stub of a pencil were sent up-stream on the river of time, slipped sideways into a parallel dimension, and fell into the lap of Hgou, an easily flustered Neanderthal taking a nap. Hgou woke with a shriek and, in a panic, threw the notebook into his cooking fire, never realizing, had he been able to read, a mess...age had been written there in Greflan, the most widely used language in the universe. The message read:

"To whom it may concern, Civilization is overrated. Nothing but bills, bills, bills. Skip the wheel. Forget about fire. You've been duly warned!"

As it turns out, Hgou was quite impressed with how briskly the notebook burned, and began to wonder for the first time what else might burn, besides tree barks, mamoth droppings, and the hair on the top of his head.
As far as the pencil was concerned, he recognized teeth marks when he saw them, and felt fortunate that the previous owner hadn't finished eating it before he got a chance to. But even his massive molars weren't up to the task, and the pencil soon joined the notebook in the fire.

It was at that moment that an extremely strange creature materialized at the mouth of the cave. Resembling a cross between a two foot long snail and a spider. Gre-li, had braved the perilious journey to deliver yet another message. She had wanted to tell Hgou to completely disregard the previous message her husband had sent, since he was having quite a bad week, and had lost his job at the slug factory. She had wanted to tell him there were many wonderful things that civilization could offer him, such as water parks, romance novels, and ruthlessly conquering other solar systems, but only managed to say "spplplat!", as Hgou dropped a boulder the size of, well, a very large boulder, down upon her, smashing her flat.

Hgou rolled the boulder out of the cave, and scraped the remains of the foul smelling creature off of the floor, but never was able to remove the stains.

Shadow

I spent my childhood mostly alone. Walking upto someone or engaging a conversation and making friends has always been difficult tasks. Before I knew it I had built up a shell around myself, isolating myself from the rest of the world. During recess everyone would gather in groups or pairs with their friends. Only I was left, as a single dot, alone... When I tried to approach them, it always felt like I was walking on a conveyor belt. The distance just doesn't grow any closer. In time I had grown to enjoy my loneliness. It's not so bad, there is no one to disagree with, no one to argue with. Living by myself, inside my own world, has brought me a little ounce of comfort. It wasn't long until all the color in my world dried up, like it was some comic book or old movie. A dull black and white world became what I wake up to each morning.

One day I decided to go on an adventure. I rode on my cycle further and further following the black road. I rode out of town and kept going until I came upon a lake, surrounded by big green trees or at least I think they were green. In this black and white world these details sometimes becomes difficult to tell. The only thing that was colored was my shadow. He wore a gray t-shirt, blue jeans and white sneakers. He had short black hair and black eyes.

"How great would it be to live in a world of colors" I thought "where grass is green and the sky is blue..."

Then a voice interrupted my thoughts. "Hi there!! Will you play with me?" it said.

I turned around but there was no one. "Down here!!" it said.

I looked down and saw my colorful shadow offering his hand. "Hi there will you play with me?" he said.

Maybe I'm dreaming or maybe it was some sort of magic but it didn't really matter. This was the first time someone invited me and without a second thought I said "Sure."

Shadow and I played tag and raced each other. We climbed the trees and swam in the lake and when we were too tired to move, we lied down on the grass and talked. Shadow and I shared many things in common, we have the same hobbies. We both liked the same food, the same books and many other things. I also learned shadow did not have any friends and shared the same problems as I do.

I guess time really does fly by when you're having fun, the sun started to set and I had to leave. We said our goodbyes and headed off. I hurried home. When I arrived, I went straight into my room and closed the door behind me. I sat in my desk and started recalling everything that happened that day. All my activities with shadow, all our conversations. I repeated to myself, as if writing a journal in my mind. "He said, then I said..." recalling word after word and even busting out in laughter while remembering our jokes. It wasn't long before mom called for dinner. I ate, then washed up and lied in bed. Exhausted from the day, I slowly fell asleep.

The next day during recess, a group of classmates was playing football. I decided to approach them, this time it was a lot simpler. It was as if my imaginary conveyor belt has stopped. Mustering up all my courage and using my most polite voice I asked "Excuse me can I play?" It turned out they were down a player and happily let me join. After school instead of going straight home, I rode my cycle to the lake where I had been yesterday. I couldn't wait to tell shadow about my new friends. As I arrived, I noticed something felt different. I can't pinpoint it exactly but the surrounding didn't feel as bright as it was yesterday. I started calling for shadow however this time he did not reply. I called again and again but to my disappointment, whatever magic that was here yesterday was gone. It grew late and I had to head back home. The next day, during recess, I played football again with my new friends. During the game I noticed shadow stretching out from me. He was surrounded by many other shadows in their colorful world. Where they laughed and played. With a grin on my face,
I thought to myself "I see now, shadow has also made friends."

Untitled

"Maybe I should have just stayed home……"
But it was too late. He could never turn back now. Not after all that had happened he needed to do this. It was this or a guilt ridden life for as long as he lives – which probably wasn’t going to be long.
He slowly approaches the gloomy bunglow, which was shadowed under the cover of clouds, he took a moment to stare at the majestic mansion that had stood for years, – against rain or shine, it had held its ground – and had untold millions of rumors about being haunted, ghostly lights that roam the vast hallways, the emptiness inside was unspeakable. He stood in front of the wooden teak door and slowly reach for the door bell, he was aware that his heart was beating faster and faster like a drum solo was being performed in his chest, ready to burst out of his chest at a moment’s notice. With a heavy heart he presses the doorbell and seals his fate!
DING DONG, DING DONG.

The bell echo out into the compound and into his ears like a huge parade was going inside his ear! It rang and rang until finally, the doorknob started to turn, slowly at first, then the door was slowly pulled open, inch by inch. Its hinges squeak, a sure sign that it needed a few drops of oil…
A skeletal hand appear at the crack of the door, a voice ask what the man wanted, its face hiding in the shadows.
The man had suddenly lose his voice and made a sort of squeaking sound that was barely audible
"Speak up if you want to be heard boy!!"
The voice was hoarse and hollow. Each syllable sends a shiver down his spine. Making him sweat, he clear his throat and tries again, but to no avail.
He clears his throat one more time, and this time manages to squeak out what he was trying to say.
"You – your, pi-pi-pi-pizza i-i-i-is he-he-he-here, si-si-si-si-sir."

Sanjay

A closed room, grey smoke accentuating the grey walls. A bed in the middle of the room and a figure lying almost lifeless. Suddenly fingers move, eyelids flutter and then open slowly. Smoky, dreamy eyes come into view. Sits up, looks into the watch. Its almost 10’ o clock at night. Its been almost 4 hrs Sanjay has been in that room. He reached out his hands for a pack of cigarette. Opened its lid and looked in disbelief. It was empty. He had bought a 10 pack before entering his room. His eyes lingered towards the ashtray. The ashtray was filled to brim with cigarette butts. Slowly lowered his head and let out a sigh. He stood up, scratching his head about what to do. He put on his tracks and goes out to have something to eat. The weather is good outside. Cool wind is blowing. As he steps into the road, his face is swept over by a gush of fresh air. His lungs craving for oxygen. He inhales the air like some fierce beast. Sanjay is feeling much lighter now. Buys some cigarettes on the way. Lights one.  In the dark road lit only by moon, he walks slowly, a cigarette in the corner of his lips, a humming a tune and mind racing.

“I am a loner. But was I always the same?”

The answer came “Yes”. Sanjay always talked less and at times never talked. He loves listening, observing. He could never come to terms with the life he is leading. He always has been like this. Books and movies are his life. Through them he lives.

Books were an age old addiction of him. It was inherited by him from his mother.  He remembers, by the age of 14, he had almost read most of the famous novels and classics in English literature. He was intrigued by Jules Verne. How can a person dwelling in an almost ignorant world could imagine so ahead of his time? His only disappointment is that he had never read any classics of his mother tongue. He had spent most of time outside which was a debacle for him to learn his mother tongue properly.

Movies was a recent addition to his habit. Watching movies made him dream. He could see the world according to his own terms. He could feel the movie. Movies played an important role in clearing some of the smoke in his mind.

Sanjay reaches a small shack which serves food. He saw an empty table and occupies that. Looks around and then orders a plate of ‘Aloo Paratha’. The owner of the shop and another customer sitting in front of me are shouting over the country’s state of affairs. Sanjay feels a burst of hope that there are some who still cares but then hangs down his head because this will always stay till shouting. Nothing will be done. Nothing will they do. He finishes his food, pays the owner and exits the shop.

He lights another cigarette.

“Can’t I do anything? This is democracy. Who is going to stop me?”

 Like others, Sanjay has been compelled to take the path that others traverse. For money, for love, responsibility, duty. These needs to be fulfilled. Bonds and ties have burdened him. He wants to run away, to fly but cannot. He wants to be different like many others before him who have tried to make a difference and succeeded. He has hope. He has faith over humanity. May be someday we will understand.

He reaches home. Undresses. Switches the lights off. Goes to sleep. He is dreaming of a beautiful girl. The girl he has loved and will love.

The Dream

Twisting and twirling blurry vision
Seems like a lost mission
The devil commands a soul to do its bidding
A soul begs the devil to be kidding

Round and round we go
Round the pit of woe
Our games hit a new low
Spare me please! the pain and sorrow
Though they come toe in toe
With this whole new show

Sour me, devour me
Leave me, deceive me
Break me, make me
Love me, hate me
Just don’t wake me

Mixing and twirling blurry vision
Seems like a lost mission
The devil commands my soul to do its bidding
My soul begs the devil to be kidding

Wake me up from this dream
As the world must be better
Than this nightmarish scheme
Sending God a complaint letter
Writing down my constant scream

The Clown

He is a small clown in a busy Circus. The circus has many animals, trapeze artists, jugglers the guys who ride around in the Death Well. The clown takes a walk around the circus waves to Samson the lion, pats Jumbo the elephant then he bends to pick up some hay .This he gives to the horses who are getting ready to take the kids for a ride . He slowly trudges off into the extreme right of the Circus .This is where the Circus manager has his office .The clown has been summoned by the manager this morning .He has some important and rather urgent news to share with the clown . The Clown is in his mid thirty has a paunch, broad shoulders with short skinny hands . He is wearing his red nose and his hair are colored orange and red .They are long and shoulder length. He walks with a little hunch and stoop of his shoulders.
The clown stops at a near by tent the sign reads 'Circus Manager' .The Clown stops he dusts himself up , combs his long hair , fixes his red nose and enters the tent. The circus manager greets the clown and offers him some tea .He is in a reflective mood the manager and slowly comes to the point .
“Look here Hari, I know you have been in the circus for a long time , and we owe you a lot .In the last 2 decades you were a rage young acrobat and mega talented. We have done hundreds of shows together and made a lot of money .You know what they say buddy, Time and Tide wait for none.Things have changed, now the movies are the in thing , the disco’s , the night clubs, nobody wants to come to the Circus .You know the family system is breaking up all around the world .People go to strip bars for fun these days or maybe watch football at home. Circus is just not the in thing these days."
The Clown took a deep breath as if to contemplate that the worse was about to come. His words were making him edgy as if a bomb was about to be dropped on him .
“In the light of the above Hari, old friend, we will have to ask you to relinquish your services to the Circus , we are going to have to ask you to leave.”
It came as a big shock , he had been with the circus for over a decade. The circus was what all he had known as a child his only home. This was all he had ever known . He had no skills to survive in the outside world. What would he do ? How was he to support himself? These questions were whizzing past his head.
Where would he go , he had no home apart from the circus , he would be on the street .
“Shankar, I have served the circus since a child for over twenty years , I would not know what to do.”
He took off his wig and nose and kept it on the table.
”I mean I don’t even know now what the real me is . Am I Hari or am I just the clown. Which face is for real and which is not”.
With these words he started sobbing , as tears rolled by the circus master realized that this was not going to be an easy task . He kept his arms around Hari as if to reassure him, that things were not all that bad . He took out his cheque book and wrote out a check to Hari .
As Shankar handed him a cheque the clown started coughing and wheezing . He took the check nevertheless and kept it in his coat pocket . Shankar looked at him with concern in his eyes . He then escorted Hari out of the tent . The impact of what had happened had just hit Hari as he slowly walked towards the rear end of the circus where his tent was. His strides where slow and unsteady .He walked into his tent and looked around .There were trophies on the wall , photographs with governors of past years , photo’s doing his juggling act . The vast variety of masks , coats , fur and hats adorned the walls . The clown slowly opened his cupboard and started to pack his belongings into a case.

He first kept the clothes ,shirts , trousers and boxer shorts then he started packing his photographs ,his red noses lying on the table .He couldn’t control himself now , he sat on the bed and started to cry . With a heavy heart he finished his packing . Now finding the tent totally empty he found himself totally alone . He paused for a while then switched off the lights and left his tent.
As he strode out into the fast field he saw the animals again one by one .The lions , the elephants and the horses .He slowly waved them good bye , the animals nod as if they were replying to him. He saw a bunch of trapeze boys having their morning tea .
"We will miss you Hari old mate .” One of them cried out .
Hari waved to them and did a little juggling act with the red balls , something for which he was famous for. He walked up to the iron gate where the gatekeeper is waiting for him to come . He opens the gate for him and then takes his hat off and bows , just out of respect . The clown gives him a nod and a wave and passes by the circus gate .He trudges along and then turns back as if to see the gates of the circus for the last time. He has a tear in his eyes and takes a red handkerchief out to wipe them off.
Now he is all alone, unequipped to live in the real world. He finds a near by park in the middle of a busy street and sit’s on a bench . He looks around to see traffic passing by , noises of the city resonate in the air . He slowly takes a sweet bun out of his pocket and begins to eat it .He then realizes that he has a check given to him by Shankar in that pocket too. He takes the cheque out, looks at it and looks around .He sees a bank and walks right in to encash the check . As he goes through the bank's revolving door he comes into a huge lobby .He sees a busy man in a suit and tie sitting in a cubicle marked Bank Manager.
He tells the man he has a check to encash and that he wants to apply for a job in the Bank. The manager looks at him with disdain .The clown was looking ridiculou with his fiery red hair and red nose asking for a serious job in the bank .The manager refutes the idea and asks him to leave immediately .The clown looks around and sees advertising posters, banners and pamphlets of the bank. All these are making huge service product promises like our bank has over a million satisfied customers, our bank makes people smile, we keep customers happy. He points out to the manager saying,
“See that’s what working in your bank is all about, it is about making customers happy and about putting a smile on their faces. I have been doing just that for the past years in the circus .I Hari the Clown has been making people smile, who could know that better then me”.
The manager is not pleased, says
”Look Hari you don’t have the experience or the qualifications required to work in a bank, we would not know what to do with a clown."
The clown is persistent and takes out four juggling balls from his pocket and starts to perform his juggling act. Everyone in the lobby is pleasantly bemused and start looking at what the clown is doing . He then takes out more balls from his coat pocket and starts to throw the balls higher and higher . As he stops everyone has gathered around him and start to clap and smile. The kids start to dance for joy to see the clown in such a mood . When he stops he looks at the bank manager as if to say
”Look I made your customers smile in minutes , how am I not qualified to work for your bank”.
The bank manager is having none of it and asks the guards to throw the stupid clown out of the house . As he is being taken out from the other door a little girl walks up to him and gives him a lollipop .The clown looks towards her with compassion and has a tear in his eye. The little girl pats the clown and the clown gives her a red nose and squeezes it . The girl giggles and the clown is ushered out of the door.
He goes back to the park bench and sits on it again disappointed that the real world has no place for him where he could make a living. He looks around again with a sense of helplessness and despondency . He sees an airline office, ah! his eyes light up with glee .
He walks into the airline office .The big doors usher him in. He sees the way to the manager’s cabin, sits on the chair and introduces himself. The airline manager who has just finished having a banana , looks at him as if to say.
“What can I do for you now.”
He tells him the same story that he is Hari the clown and wants a job at the airline. The manager looks amused. He waves the clown away saying that he had no merit to be working for an airline.
The clown is persistent in his efforts , he looks around to find banners and posters proclaiming what a fine airline it was . How they made millions of customers smile .How happy each customer was with their service etc. The clown asks why he is the most qualified to work here , since he has made people smile and be happy all his life .He takes out his red balls and starts to do his famous juggling act again.
All of a sudden people start to come forward into the lobby and start to cheer the clown, who is busy doing his juggling act. The crowd begins to clap and smile. Laughter bellows through the lobby the prospective customers are in a state of delight . The airline manager however hates the commotion that the clown was causing and asks him to leave. Two guards come and catch the clown by the hand and take him to the door.
Hari finds himself at the park again. There is a turmoil inside him.
"What will I do? How will I feed myself?" He mutters struggling hard to keep out the tears.
His eyes falls to the lollipop given by that little girl from bank. Smilling, he starts sucking. Memories flood him as to how he was so famous amongst little children. How they would laugh and giggle. How he would laugh seeing them.
His eyes suddenly lit up. He knew exactly what to do. This time he went to the bank again with the sole purpose to encash his cheque. He goes back to his shanty and removes the traces of his profession. Wears clean clothes and goes out.
Standing in front of the Advertising Agency, with a sense of purpose he walks in.
"I would like to throw up an advertisemnt."
Tne officer gave him a form to fill up the details. He submits the form and pays the money.
"I do, what I do best" He says to himself.
The caption of the advertisement read "Clown available for children birthday parties"

A Christmas Story

In a faraway distant land covered by sands of snow, a constant breeze of warm love and the aroma of happiness. Lush trees with wrafer leaves, sugar stick fruits and cotton candy flowers. Cute little birds singing the sweet song of love.
There was this gigantic building covered with wreath and tinkling bells. There was this atmosphere of excitement and activity inside. The door opened gently with a gigling creak.
A man as old as christmas, flowing white beard and a physique that could give even the most affluent inactive person a run for his money. His eyes were like blue sky with a twinkle. His ruddy red cheeks like roses in full blossom. He was wearing a red coat outlined with white. Time and again he thundered
"Ho...Ho..Ho...!!"

This man whom we all know as Santa Claus or more lovingly 'Santa' was busy packing his bag with toys and sweets and all the goodies that an earthly being could desire.
A few yards away stood his assistant, Elkis. His expression was the total opposite of his surroundings. Drooping lips, twitching eyebrows and a dismal face.
"What makes you worry so much? Is it your love for me?" Santa asked him, chuckling.
"No Sir, I m-m-mean yes sir. I do love you. Who does not. But i do not think wooden toys, cute rag dolls, shovels, sand buckets, trinklets would be what the children desire most nowadays." Elkis replied.
"You worry too much, my son. Trust me. This is going to work. Ho...Ho...Ho..." Santa replied with a grin.
He went on about his work decorating his sleigh. He whistled and out came a pack of reindeers with majestic horns galloping in glee. These princely creatures alligned themselves with the sleigh. Santa reined them, patting them lovingly and whispering in there ears. Then with one swift movement which betrayed his age and physique, he swung the huge bag of gifts into the sleigh. He then climbed into the sleigh.
"Don't be naughty while i am away, Elkis" Santa said waving his hands. Elkis waved back with a smile.
"Tuk...Tuk..."
The reindeers raised their ears and then gracefully started running, pulling the sleigh behind. It began to snow now. The flakes were like cotton of varying shapes and sizes.
As the sleigh dissapeared into the horizon, Elkis was left with a deep thought.
"Age has finally affected Santa's thinking. I should better prepare my resume." Elkis thought.
Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells
Jingle all the way...
The night was filled with this tune alongwith tinkling bells. Santa had arrived. He stopped at the first roof top. Took out a toy from the sack. Then he jumped into the chimney. Somehow he seemed to fit himself inside.
He proceeded stealthily to the room occupied by a child. He glanced at him lovingly. He then took out a grain from a pouch dangling from his belt and deposited on the eyes of the child.
"The Sand of Dreams. Such an innovative idea." Santa thought to himself with a grin.
He then placed the toy beside the bed of the child. He left the house as stealthily as he had arrived. This went on till every little child had a little toy beside them. Santa, sitting in his sleigh, stroked his beard with a smile. A smile of a job well done. He was chuckling to himself as to how happy the children would be when they wake up to find a cute little toy beside them. He was stiffling the tears of joy.
"Tuk...Tuk..."
The reindeers started off, taking their rider back to his home.
They next day.....
"Mom!! I asked santa for a Playstation but I got this strange round object tied with a string. What am i to do with it?"
"Its a yo-yo son. Its a very nice thing to play with. Let me teach you"
"I do not want to play with this. All my friends will be getting cool things."
In another house...
"Mama!! What is this?" A child asked clutching a building block set.
"This is a building block set. You need to use the appropriate blocks to build a structure. May be a nice little home or whatever you like" Mother replied with a nostalgic smile.
"I do not want to build anything. I need a X-Box. My friend's father had bought him one last year. It was so cool."
In another home...
"Ma... Look!! I got a doll. Its so soft and it does not break"
Her mother looked at her daughter, astonished. They could not afford a doll for their child. She said with a smile
"Yes dear. Indeed its a nice doll. Come, let me decorate it for you"
"Can you teach me?" the child said enthusiatically.
"Sure, sweetheart"
They both sat down and started decorating the doll. Both were laughng and gigling.
This was the situation in evry home. Some were unhappy with the presents, some were not.
Santa is sitting in his chair, warming his feet by the fireplace. Elkis was standing beside him with the same gloomy expression.
"I told you. Children are not going to like the kind of gifts you have given them this year. The happiness quotient is down to an all time low. If you look at this graph you will....."
"Ahhhhh.... You worry too much, my boy. Do you see this white hair? They haven't become so just like that. Wait and watch. Now let me sleep...."
Sipping on to a cup of hot chocolate, he strode off.
The next day....
Children have never been so dissapointed any christmas. Everywhere, little groups of children were huddled, talking excitedly about all the useless things they recieved this year.
There was this one group round the corner of a street involved animatedly in a discussion that would have given CEOs a complex. On the the other side of the road, a small boy was playing with his yo-yo. He had recievd this as a christmas present and his father had spent almost an entire day teaching him how to play.
The group's eyes fell on him and they looked on with amazement. The boy was throwing the yo-yo at awkward angles and everytime it was returning back to his hand. He was laughing and gigling, amazed at his own skill.
One boy from the group said "Hey, I got one of those as a present."
"Hey!!" He shouted to the small boy. "Excuse me, can you teach me how to play with this?"
"Surething" The boy replied back.
After sometime fiddling around, the boy had become quite adept with yo-yo and had started showing off to his friends, his newly aquired skills. Everyone were dumbstruck and were eager to show themselves off as well.
"Wow!! This is so cool. Can you teach me? Is it interesting?" Rest of the guys circled around the now blushing kid. He has made some new friends.
In another part of the town...
A bunch of girls were in a same kind of discussion.
"I asked for a Princess Barbie but instead got this rag doll. Can't even put makeup on this thing. Its so hideous" Every other girl were also having a sad face as their story was also similar.
"Hey!! Look at that girl over there. She's also having this rag doll, but... but... its so beautiful. I wish i had got that one"
"Hey you!! From where did you get this doll?"
"Santa gave this to me" She replied back clutching her doll.
"Its so beautifull."
"Yes, me and my mother decorated it with bits of clothes and small trinklets. Look!! you can do whatever you like, it won't break. YTou can even wash it if it gets dirty"
"Come to my home, I have some left over clothes. Can you show me how to decorate this doll?"
"Allright" The girl replied back smiling shyly.
So they all went and  sat down to decorate their respective dolls. They had a fun afternoon and after an hour they wear wearing a smile of satisfaction. Each girl had a doll customised as they wanted and all were looking beautiful. They all thanked the girl.
"You can play with us if you want to"
"Thank you, I would love to" The girl replied with a laughter. She too made some new friends.
Little children running around playing with toys, making snow castles,snow man. There was an air of excitement and activity. It was filled with children's laughter. Everyone was happy.
Santa came up and stood behind Elkis. Placed his hand in Elkis's shoulder.
"A pretty sight out there. What say Elkis?"